Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
