So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
