Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize
