Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
I have two girls sleeping in my bed naked and I ended up making it to class, what were you saying about staying in on the weekdays?
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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