i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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