I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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