Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
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