The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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