Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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