batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
