You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
