Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
Threesome in a minivan. New low
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Randomize
