what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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