i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
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