I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
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