I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
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