Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Randomize
