Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
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