You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
