the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
Girls should come with a carfax report
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
