Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
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