did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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