lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
