Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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