sorry about calling you the devil all night.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
