There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
Randomize