i would punch a child for taco bell
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
