Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
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