fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
Randomize
