She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Enjoy the penises
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Randomize
