just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
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