I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
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