i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
