like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
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