so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Randomize
