she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
2020 sucks, I want a refund
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