reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
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