I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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