# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Riddle me this. What had unbelievable sex, and finally understands the meaning that things come better in pairs?
I hate you
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Randomize
