This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
Randomize
