so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Randomize
