Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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