he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Randomize