waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
I didn't notice because vodka
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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