I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
Randomize
