dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
Randomize
