He disabled his match.com account in front of me
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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