let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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