I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize