I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Randomize
