I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
